I texted the pic above to my relatives yesterday. A simple cup of tea made for Mom, and the TV clicker resting on the arm of her Lazy-Boy, fave blankets at the ready, sofa table repurposed and stocked with her ointments and creams and her phone.
It ignited a slew of memorial tea making among the family as sons, daughters, grandchildren and great grandchildren joined in and brewed up a cup for Mom.
That was Mom’s command central these past years. When not napping or watching TV she kept in contact with her family and friends.
Mom was known for her bleach strength tea, her sweet tooth and her lack of filters. And look who forgot to set out the cookies. I added some later.
Mom passed away at Toronto Western after contracting the UK covid variant at Runnymede. She would not have been in either institution were it not for the malevolence and incompetence of St. Joe’s. Do not send your elderly there, it seems geriatric treatment means charnel house conditions throughout our healthcare system. No vaccine was ever offered her at any of the hospitals she was in despite her advanced age of 96 and underlying vulnerabilities and to be blunt not all healthcare staff are “heroes” unless ill-treatment of the elderly has been elevated as a qualifier for “Hero Status.”
I spent just under four hours at Mom’s bedside in the early AM before she passed away. I have been advised by her doctor to isolate for 2 weeks and to expect a call from public health to check up on my compliance. The Doc was genuine in her concern at my having spent so long (read too long by protocol) with Mom. I was pushy enough or staff were understanding enough when I explained Mom’s sad journey through our health care system that I was granted access and sorta maybe allowed to exceed the rules a bit. Mom would understand where I get that stubbornness from. Kathy would understand too. I will isolate but I don’t care if I “catch it.”
Yes a tough year, so what’s a little Covid gonna do?
Since Mom was a Covid death the funeral homes “charge” a little bit more. There will be no visitation or viewing of Mom’s body prior to cremation. I at least was afforded time alone with Kath. We will have family and friends services once the plague is over.
I know that my grief is no worse and no better than all those who have suffered the loss of loved ones at any time but especially during this wretched era when even our grieving is so brutally truncated.
Kathy’s loss is the worst of heartbreaks as is Mom’s passing, but looking out for Mom had the benefit of keeping me busy and out of trouble after Kath was taken from us. Now with Mom gone it will be just me and Buddy and of course the never ending paperwork demanded by our bureaucracy. So it is likely a good thing Buddy is so demanding of my time.
I was blessed to have Kath and Mom in my life and for that will never be anything but a fortunate man.
I take comfort in their memory and knowing they watch over me.
Join us in a cup of tea in honour of all our loved ones.
